There is very little (if any) physical pain associated with the procedure, but there is a terribly unpleasant sensation of what they like to call "pressure," which feels a lot like a narrow piece of PVC pipe being rudely impaled into your eye socket. Is it painful? No. Is it awful? Oh, yes. Quite.
The experience itself feels a lot like tripping on LSD, being held hostage in A Clockwork Orange theater, getting your criminal mind right. And, yes, it's precisely as much fun as it appears to be.
No matter how much you've been prepared, no matter how much you've prepared yourself, you simply cannot be prepared for what you're getting yourself into. As much as you wish it didn't, your brain explicitly understands what's happening; and as capable as you may be at rationalizing your experience, as much as the surgeon comforts you with kind words and repetitive assurances that "Everything's perrrrrrrfect!" -- your alarm bells are screaming the whole time. They will not stop.
You're a compulsory and vigilant witness to every second of the surgery; given a nightmarish kind of backstage pass, feeling nothing, but watching in disbelief as your corneas are wiped in front of you like a dish rag cleaning up a damp kitchen counter.
The after effects are minimal. The first night they said I'd feel "sand" in my eyes. Another lie, it feels like healing papercuts in your eye. Does it hurt? No, but you begin to learn the jargon of Lasik pretty quickly, and why they use it.
Post-surgery I have a Lasik "hickey" in my left eye. Think of it as the entire left side of my eye being completely blood shot. (Not hard for those of you whom I've had the pleasure of getting properly loaded whith ... ;) It will fade, in "One to three weeks." Becoming a pro at the careful language of Lasik, I'm pretty sure it's gonna be at least three ...
This morning I have zero physical irritation. I feel nothing from the procedure itself except a little eye dryness. I'm taking anti-inflammatory, antibiotic, and lubrication eye drops every four hours, but feeling perfectly fine.
All that truthfully said, you may ask, am I glad that I did it? Hell yeah.
It's funny. I'm physically exhausted today. Not from the demands of the procedure, but from my adrenals being shot from the stress of this bizarre circus ride. So, I'm kicking back. Taking it easy.
Watching birds.
Day dreaming.
Imagine what it's going to be like, camping this spring. Waking up to see this:
5 comments:
you're a braver woman than i am (wait, that didn't come out right).
congrats. i'm jealous, but far too paranoid to "join the club" anytime soon.
I'm with T, a chicken.
Enjoy your new eyes :-)
Ed
See, the deal is, is that if everything goes to hell in a handbasket, and we're all living under bridges, ya'll will be sweating it like Piggy in Lord of the Flies.
Not me. I'll be Godlike, with super-sonic-super vision. :cool: ...
You are going to totally LOVE having clear vision. I was almost legally blind with nearsightedness and had the procedure a few years back. Best thing I EVER did. EVER! I still remember taking that first shower the day after the surgery. I could READ the shampoo label!!! I almost cried with joy.
Now I can't imagine mountain biking in dusty Colorado or skiing in the dry mountain air with contacts.
Oddly enough, my impression of the surgery was very different from yours. I thought is no big deal - didn't freak me out at all. I was also fortunate to have a text book recovery, which I wish to you as well.
Thanks for the good wishes itty bitty! Text book recovery so far, yes. With the exception of that lovely lasik hickey. It's fading fast, and seems to fade more with increased exercise. Which reminds me. Seems I have a bike to ride ..... ;)
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